There’s a great scene in Office Space where David Herman’s character, whose name is Michael Bolton, explains why he won’t go by “Mike” instead of “Michael.”
“Why should I change? He’s the one who sucks.”
Alas that character was stuck with a name that everyone today associates with someone else.
And some baseball players are stuck with that same fate.
Some played before their namesake became famous… but not everyone.
(Hey parents of of Howard Johnson and Milton Bradley. REALLY? You didn’t know that name was taken?)
So here is another Sully Baseball 25 Man Roster… this one filled completely with players who are namesakes of another famous person.
As always there are 8 starting position players, 10 pitchers, a top pinch hitter, a reserve catcher, 2 reserve infielders and 2 reserve outfielders and a 25th man who could play any position.
So let’s get going (says the guy whose name is the same as a Chicago Tribune Chicago White Sox writer.)
Boomer, the slugging Boston first baseman with the different colored gloves
NOT the Oscar winning star of Patton.
STARTING SECOND BASEMAN
Starting second baseman for the Cardinals and Cubs – 1972-1981
NOT the ear biting, Hangover appearing ex Heavyweight Champ
The All Star and champion shortstop for the Didgers from 1969-1986
NOT the legendary Celtic center who is, say it with me…
THE GREATEST CHAMPION IN AMERICAN SPORTS HISTORY! (Nobody is close.)
STARTING THIRD BASEMAN
HOWARD JOHNSONThe All Star switch hitting third baseman for the Mets
NOT the guy from Massachusetts who founded the Hotel and Restaurant Chain
STARTING LEFT FIELDER
Star slugger for the 1921 World Champion Giants.
NOT the Oscar winning comic genius.
STARTING CENTER FIELDER
The dynamic leadoff hitter for the Giants and Dodgers who beat cancer
NOT the star of Grace Under Fire
STARTING RIGHT FIELDER
The sometimes great but always troubled outfielder.
NOT the board game manufacturer.
The former All Star whose career had amazing peaks and staggering valleys
NOT the country music star known as “The Gambler.”
The A’s #2 starter for the 1989 World Champions
NOT the outspoken director of Roger and Me and Fahrenheit 9-11
Fidgety Phil, a former 16 game winner for the Philadelphia Phillies
NOT the creative genius behind Sussudio.
The right handed pitcher for the 1966 Tigers and 1967 Mets
NOT the Rock Concert promoter nor the evangelical preacher
The starting pitcher from the 1880s
NOT the late Lion of the Senate.
The out of his mind nuts closer for the World Champion Giants
NOT the out of his mind nuts genius behind the Beach Boys
The effective reliever for the Giants and Indians
NOT the Late King of Pop
The lefty specialist for the 2004 World Champion Red Sox
NOT the star of Wayne’s World, Austin Powers and Shrek
The ace closer for the Red Sox who inspired a Stephen King book.
NOT the savior of the Universe.
The Lefthander for the 1952 NL Champion Brooklyn Dodgers
NOT the Three Time Indy 500 Champion known as Lone Star JR
TOP PINCH HITTER
The hard hitting utility player for the Pirates and Tigers in the 1980s.
NOT the Lizard King.
The utility infielder for several teams including the 1970 NL Champion Reds
NOT the beloved Oscar winning legend
DON JOHNSONThe former All Star second baseman for the 1945 NL Champion Cubs
NOT Crockett from Miami Vice.
The reserve outfielder for the 1995 and 1996 Cardinals
NOT the great Steelers Quarterback and Fox Sports lunatic
(who is great in The Cannonball Run)
“Honest Eddie” who did NOT take money from gamblers as a member of the 1919 White Sox
NOT Axel Foley
The Indians superstar catcher of the future.
NOT the rock legend and singer of songs like “Oye Como Va.”
The superstar Tampa Bay third baseman who evidently can’t afford to buy a new cap.
NOT the unbelievably sexy star of Desperate Housewives.
His name is close enough to Eva’s to be included here. And let’s face it, having Eva’s picture on this post will get a few more hits on a Google search.
Now I am NOT going to sink to the point where I would write Sexy Nude Pics of Eva Longoria on this page just to increase traffic.